You microorganism you.

What if I told you there was a big circular thang....it has this liquid iron core in the middle of it that creates a magnetic field in the middle from its spinning.
Aligning the solid portion of this circle was these tiny little microorganisms with these rather impressive brains, there were about 6 to 7 billion of them.
These brains spend everyday driving these little pieces of metal to a place where they make money to survive.
These tiny microorganisms hate each other. They do jot have to meet each other to hate each other- instead they hate each other for how they believe they got there and what color or accent each microorganism has.
They kill each other, they chirp nasty hateful things but yet... they are all the same.
So you have 7 billion people who just hate on each other....and for what REAL reason really?

Because I am sick of people asking....

What are you going to school for?
People moan and groan bout my decision to go (I know, everyone elses parental units and siblings encourage college, but my background is very different in that area).
They live within the firm belief that I am simply going to school to skip out on a 40 hour a week job.
Little do they realize, that I have to eventually leave school and try to plan ahead further than that.

Anyways. To start..im very facinated in journalism. In fact, so much I  would love at this point to land a job writing for a living, Ive always had a connection with people and believe that media culture and proper advertising is a key to changing the world in a positive way.

With that said, a job in writing would be perfect. Its not the most practical choice seeing as its not incredibly easy to just land a random job as a writer, but ive many other media related options as well.

Social media manager would be another example of a great job to land, also known as a creative manager. On salaries.com creative managers can make about 75 grand a year.

With that said, ive also heavily considered advertising as an solid career, and would love to land a job with a company doing something along that line. Anything to stretch my  creative flow.

I am looking into getting into WSUV's CMDC (Creative Media and Digital Culture) program. Its a technological point of view on many of those things ive already discussed.


Here is an example of the program offered at wsuv.

CMDC program overview: http://cas.vancouver.wsu.edu/cmdc

Website overviewing classes and more information:  http://www.dtc-wsuv.org/cmdc/

requirements meaning the  class and course lists: http://www.dtc-wsuv.org/cmdc/requirements.html

Some careers in the field that I am looking into: http://www.dtc-wsuv.org/cmdc/careers.html

So there, in case you wanted to know why I am wasting my life and will be paying off student loans for a wee bit of a while after I graduate in about 4 years...this is the future plan for me :)

Dead zone.

Lately, bustling through my second term of college, im learning more about my own personality but the biggest mystery that ive yet to find is inspiration. There are times where I am so moved or inspired by something...that I feel the need to be cloned. Other times, I could not be inspired if someone lit a firecracker underneath my borrowed seat.
Inspiration in creativity, me time. Inspiration in makin this the best damn research paper I have ever written. Things I want in life, things I strive for..but part of me is dead. We need zombie-chiliconholly, I need to come back from the dead.
I have learned that dopamine seems to be a receptor to that good feeling that says "I just experienced something amazing!" but dopamine is a stubborn hormone- it only releases in small amounts unless it is a brand new experience.
It is usually if I have or can make time for things, there is no inspiration, a dead zone of thought process. Coffee used to help, it no longer does. Internet searching used to help, now it just absorbs me. Its a simple matter of "am i feeling it. or am i not?" Is that my old brain just getting dusty and riddled with cob webs? or am I just getting stubborn as I get older?
Also, as much as I love college, I feel like it pissed all over my writing career. The formality is down a little better, but I need to find an elective that gives me interesting topics to write about.
Once upon a time, there was too much to write about. In the past 6 months to a year, it has been a royal struggle to write about anything other then whats happening right now, right in Vansterdam that immediately effects me and my life.

Dead zones.

1. Work- I am here too much. When time allows me to be creative or write something rad because all the work is done for the day and it is a long shift, I do not feel it at all. 
2. When my laptop is in front of me- which is ironic seeing that I need it in front of me to post on a blog or write a review on yelp or do SOMETHING to save myself.
3. settle down time- when ive had that post-work shower and im ready to roll.
4. when everyone is sleeping- as in, the time i can have uninterrupted writing time..
5. when I have zero to little homework.
6. Basically any spare time I have, my mind is simply dead with nothing creative or useful these days.
7. unexpected power naps- the older I get, the more i wake up wondering how i nodded off in the first place.

Live zones.

1. Driving on the highway (i am against texting or writing and driving, all i do is eat & drive!)
2. when im swamped with homework-nothing says guilt like recreational blogging when you have 30 math problems or a quarter of your paper to complete that are due by that next day or two.
3. when im in a restaurant, a shopping mall, or in a zone where im obligated to be polite and put my phone or writing tablet down.
4. Weekends with my family (see number 3)
5. hanging out with a friend (example 3 again)
6. ANYTIME I cannot be "alive" I feel inspiration to in fact be very much alive in thought and writing or creativity.
7. Pinterest-when you I am sitting there posting reasons to feel alive, I very much feel alive until I shut my laptop.

advice? help? whatever you think I should do, I miss that part of me, the idealistic one. The one with the crazy ideas and can always provide a good time. The recycled artist, the super writer.
           

Adventures in and out of the coop.

So today I was out giving my ducks and chickens their daily grain and lettuce before work. I enter the pen in my bright yellow scrubs..and everything occurs in a normal routine as has happened the past 3 years. My two craigslist ducks I adopted from battle ground are housed on one side..and my 'feed store' chickens are on the other.  As I go to finish and leave for work, my drake (male Duck, Diego) decides even though he can't fly..that he will attempt to fly the coop as I open the gate.  They are confined, but with enough open space to roam because there are many wild hawks.
I tell 'Ego' no, and to stay inside the coop and he of course being a duck..wants to come out.
I extend my arms to pick him up and he resists.
I walk back over the gate...and he spreads his wings to fly again .
We repeat the last two steps again before I insist to pick him up.
I pick him up and carry him outside of the gate and meander down the hill with him clutched in my arms.
After getting a taste of the real world...he squirms back over to go back to the coop where he knows its safe and sound...that there are no dogs, planes, hawks and his little lady duck.
It kind of reminds me of life.....
I remembered that post high school feeling almost 10 years ago of wanting a job..wanting life to happen and I couldn't seem to escape the gate around me. I always have/do seek danger. I still do to this day...no intent to harm, but seeking adventure because routine grows old fast.
I remembered driving was the greatest (it still is somedays)but employment..tho necesscary...gets old fast. The world is a scary place...even for those that look for the adrenaline all of the time like myself.
Once I left the coop of life...lost innocence and became part of a new routine, it became just that..another routine.
Change is inevitabe...and sometimes, it fucking sucks. Sometimes...its great, positive..but we always have a sense of safety in our own coops.
I left for work that day...planning this blog out. Planning never really goes well..but it makes me remember as I drag my feet in another day of paradise, how I wish somedays to just steer clear from it. That change occurs, routine gets boring..but we always have someone who loves us to help carry us through those times of feeling 'cooped up'.

Nervous about my future.

I have been a caregiver for about a year and a half to two years now. Where I like it, I also..do not. Saying "I do not like to be a caregiver" in those words, probably makes me sound extremely insensitive. I just feel like ,it is not the job for me. Where I care about people, I make sure they are in good spirits, well cleaned up while respecting their diginity and boundaries to the best of their needs and my limits, its not the job for me. I should be in an environment with various chances to socialize with many people. The opportunity for my life to go in a direction that suits me a little better sounds like something I need to strive for. Even if its target night freight, with animals, my calling is not where I am. My spirit keeps telling me it is time to move on. So here I am, applying and applying. Planning on keeping caregiving on the side (im down to one client and a few more subs I am close too). I do want some other job, to make more money and do something a little more in my natural realm. So its back too this little short complied list of things that I am going to conduct. I give you: A. Nodding off on my computer while listening to Elton John and a half written app in front of me. B. Awkward interviews C. Lack of self motivation to complete those applications. D. The "friend connect" I always start up (texting everyone looking for work who is hiring). E.Attempts of not sounding too cocky or too self-conscious on the questionnaires F. We all know what F stands for...that 4 letter word exclaimed after a few days go by and no one has called back your name on a job :) G. What is a ligitimate job offer..and what is not. What kind of struggles do you have with applying for jobs and landing them?

The Big C.

College. a place for..pizza eaters, beer drinkers, students that have a career in mind..and now..me as well. Im excited..really. I filled out my first of many fourms..and I feel like..this huge thing is going to hit me, actually happening in front of my eyes. So far..id like to major in Journalism, and minor in business. Business will open up my opportunities too : make my own publication company (as in newspaper or real online blogging system where me and other writers join forces to entertain). Start my food cart ive been dreaming of for years, switch it all over and get into advertising..or. The skies the limits. i feel like..I picked JUST THE RIGHT major/minor..it just did not f ully hit me til now. So like a ton of bricks..I got my ass in gear, got motivated, and here I am talking of my adventures. FAFSA: Check. now..to apply myself in simple things like putting my shoes away...anotha story!

Modern and past film and life.

Its funny how they always say movies are dramatized. Yet, there are few things more dramatic then reality tv! I was watching a movie called "Chances are" with Robert Downey jr and Cybil Shepard, and lately i have been on a kick of focusing on peoples mannerisms. I notice who says please, who says thank you, how people act and treat eachother. Maybe its my weak attempt of gathering my own life lessons from movies :) One thing I did notice...is that the way men treat women and vice versa was different in the past.I do not just mean because of Hollywood, but if you watch a similar love story now, you will see very different things. Things such as, how much more tolerant, respectful they are of eachother. Obviously, that factor varies from movie to movie, but lets use this example here. RBJ pushed away the girl who he was starting to date when she went to kiss him. Naturally, and in modern tv shows and movies..she might have easily gotten up and screamed GET OUT!!! and freaked out on him. Called him a user, a slut, accused him of cheating and using her to sleep at her place, and thrown an all out American girl hissy fit. Also, the quirkyness in movies are a lot less frowned upon back then. Someone could think they are someone else's past life, and they would have them committed, or it could easily get violent in modern films. In the past films though, they are simply given awkward looks. Maybe talked about mildly to their faces or behind their backs. To me, older films are not just crappier sound and film and vhs quality. They are a depiction of a milder form and how life generally used to be.

Bob Ross, the original hipster?

So, I have always related Bob Ross to the city of Portland OR. Having grown up next door to it, I recall it being a place where the hippies and artists united and gathered. The artists, free spirited. As much as I make fun of it, some of the people are pretty awesome. Tho I still prefer the attitude of Seattle, the hospitality and friendliness they offer compared to the rest, I also believe that Portland has a definate oddball way of living.

Of course, we are talking about hipster town, so I question: was Bob Ross the original hipster?. White guy, artsy-fartsy...not afraid to be free spirited. As he beats his paintbrush against the bar to shake the water at it, giggles and says "HAHA! just beat the devil out of it!" I noticed how funky/trendy he truly is. A lot of people have made fun of his cheery disposition as the years have gone by. Now, part of his character, his look and odd ways..are trendy.

Fuzzy beard, afro...striped button up shirt are only the visuals. Everything else, kind of explains itself at that point. Looking at him as a man, and not just a guy with fancy brush strokes.. hes so masculant. In terms of, he really is not afraid to have a soft side. Give his pictures character...love his squirrels, and load his paintbrush with gorgeous colors and verbal BLUPS! and happy little trees.

Anyways...unfortunately, Bob Ross left us long ago from lymphoma. His legacy though, and skill/ability will hopefully be an inspiration to all people, hipsters and non hipsters alike.